Our Intention is in Our Name

During a recent meditation focusing on "Intention," I began to think about what I wanted for our family in 2014.  The following intention came to my mind and wrote it down as soon as I got home.   I've read a lot over the past few days about what others want for themselves and I thought I would share this.  It now hangs on the refrigerator door where our family sees it (or ignores it) every day.

THINK - What to say; what to do.

EXPRESS - Say what you need/want and use kind words.

SAFE - Our home is a safe place.  Feel free to be yourself.

SMILE - You will feel better; You will make others feel better.

EXCEL - Do your best; Be your best self; Learn new ways to achieve.

LOVE - Walk and talk with love; Feel loved because you are and give love.

This is our life to live and the words came from our name.  This is our intention for 2014.

Happy New Year!

New Day, New Year...

49 days until I turn 50.  I am excited.  This is what I love about January 1st - the day is full of hope for all that can happen in this new year.  I had written an earlier post with my 2013 resolutions.  Now that I am on this side of 2013, I have an updated list of things I want to do this year.  And as I mentioned in my previous post, these too all have a purpose for me. 
 

1. Visit the California Science Center to see the Endeavour Space Shuttle.
2. See more movies - not ones I rent (those are good too), but I want to go out to a movie theater more often.  It is still one of my favorite experiences.
3. Take more cooking classes with Elana Horwich - www.mealandaspiel.com
4. Learn from great teachers, guides, and friends.
5. Watch more old movies, those made before I was born. 
6. In my travels this coming year, I will be visiting new places and some that I have been before.  Before I arrive at each destination, I want to plan the must see sites and allow some time to see how locals live. 
7. Be compassionate - I am not always good at this.  Like strengthening a muscle, I need to work on this to help lessen my frustration and disappointment in myself.
8. Teach my kids about all kinds of classic books and music.  My husband, Perry, does an excellent job sharing his love of music with our kids.  I want to participate in this more.
9. Bring the incredible world of science more into our lives. 
10. Visit a zoo.
11. Take a road trip.
12. Visit art museums.
13. When there is an opportunity to share joy, celebrate with friends and family.
14. Stop worrying and start solving.  To limit my anxiety and stress, focus on solutions to problems.
15. Study/Meditate/Pray - Attending my Meditation Plus class has been one of my greatest gifts in 2012 and I am excited to deepen my learning in 2013.
16. Kiss and hug more and definitely hold hands.
17. Work hard. 
18. Laugh a lot.

Wishing everyone a great day one of 2013! 

Countdown to New Years - Purpose, Not Resolution

Today – December 11, 2012; Tomorrow – 20 days until New Years.  For the first time, I know exactly what I want my purpose to be.  In the past, I filled out a list so that I can “try” to make my life better.  As I got older, the list was still filled with hopes, but it was far more about me than what others thought I should be or do.

Now, my list is clear.  I leave very little room for error and the list is often filled with actual tasks rather than hopes or ideas.  Therefore, in the spirit of Chanukah, here are my first 8 actions that will appear on my 2013 Purpose List.

1.      Continue Tennis lessons and graduate to next level

2.      Continue writing blog and explore new writing opportunities

3.      Those I promised to have over, make the date with them.  And don’t invite people without making the date.  I am really sincere when I tell people that I want to have them over and then life gets in the way and I am overwhelmed with my limited time.

4.      Date Night with another couple.  Perry and I have really enjoyed sitting together with another couple and getting a chance to talk without interruptions from the kids. 

5.      Family Play dates.  Perry and I meet many friends through our kids and often, we rush a conversation at school or a party.  We would like to spend quality time with one family at a time.

6.      Walk/Meditate/Pray – I put all three of these together to highlight that I will slow down, breathe and speak to G-d.  My life moves very fast and 2013 is expected to be a sprint.  With a trips to Israel and New York already in the first half of the calendar, Maddy’s bat mitzvah will be here quickly and start the second half of the year with a bang.

7.      Laugh a lot with my kids.  Really – this is easier said than done.  With all the activities and stresses in my life, I need to put this on the list to remind me that I want to laugh with them to help balance the energy in our home.

8.      Give greater focus to solving problems.  While I want to make powerful and quick decisions, I want to be sure that I have the appropriate solution.  In many cases, I don’t believe in right or wrong, I believe there are several options to solving a problem.  To develop the best solution, I need to be more thoughtful, compassion and maybe even strategic.

With 20 days to get, I’ll consider this my first draft.  The official 2013 Purpose List will be revealed by January 3.  If you write a Purpose List, make it real and focus on the activities or efforts that force you to be fully present.  It will make all the difference in your growth.

Make it real; Make it yours.

 

Have Hope

From Dictionary.com: the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best.

This word has been on my mind these past few weeks.  As we finished the Jewish holidays and began this weekend, reading the Torah from the beginning, it is clear to me that HOPE is found within, could be inspired by others and lost in a tragic incident. 

I use the word a lot at work:  “I hope you can join us.”  “I hope you feel better.”  I hope my meeting goes well.”  I also use it at home:  “I hope you finished your homework.” “I hope you paid the bill.”  “I hope you are kidding.”  And “I hope you know how much I love you.”

I decided that I really like the word.  Years ago, during a sadder time in my life, I found the word to be very phony.  Whoever used it was not sincere.  I realized that it wasn’t them, it was me.  I was in a dark place and could not listen to anyone offering kindness.

And now as I begin this year of learning, sharing and loving, I am full of hope.  I see goodness in so many and I forgive people for being mean because I think they are really sad.   

I haven’t written New Year resolutions but it might be fitting –

 

·         Hold onto hope.
·         Hold onto love.
·         Hold onto goodness.
·         Hold onto joy.
·         Hold onto each other.
·         Hope to learn.
·         Hope to understand.
·         Love big.
·         Keep the healthy close.
·         Let the unhealthy go.
·         Meditate

Wishing everyone a year filled with love, laughter and learning.

2010 Resolutions

I have not written New Year's resolutions in a long time and decided this year to put something in writing. After all, I have a blog now, I want to use it.

1. Rebuild my boundaries - In the past two years, some of my boundaries have blurred and I will work on reinforcing those boundaries.

2. Spend time with nice people - I know some really nice people, have rekindled some old friendships and have met some new friends. This sounds easy, but sometimes we (and I mean I) get manipulated, distracted, and directed by others and then I find myself not doing what I want or being with whom I want (see #1). I want to make time for people who are nice to me; I will give them some priority in my life. In the recent past, my measurement of quality people was "Are you in the camp that makes my life easier or in the camp that makes my life harder?" That has really worked for me; However in 2010, I will just edit the question to the following, "Are you nice to me or not nice to me?

3. Outdoor living - This is a biggie in terms of editing my lifestyle, but I am going to give it a try. Simply put, I want to spend more time outdoors. In my single days, I was outside so much more, running, walking, hiking or rollerblading. Just the memories of enjoying the fresh air is enough to add this to the list and that great feeling after a hike in the mountains or a walk on the city streets, I want that back. I think this is non-negotiable and my family will just have to come with me.

4. Obviously, more writing!

5. Find a new gift giving practice for our family - Seriously, I am traumatized by this past Hanukkah experience and need to find a different way to celebrate than just presents.

6. Do more and do less - Here is the thing about resolutions and wanting to do more in one's life: I have to be willing to do less of some things. I already find myself short on time, so adding things to do will only make me crazy and then next year, I will write about accomplishing nothing. So, what can I do less - I can watch less television; You are thinking this is so obvious, but I love television and if I have one minute, I will turn it on. Next, I can sit at the computer less. Believe it or not, I drafted this blog with pen and paper before I typed it (gasp, what is a pen and paper?). I am still an old-fashioned girl that way. Finally, I can live at a whim less. During the week, my life is planned by work, my meetings, lunch dates, conference calls - all planned. On the weekends, I wake up and decide what to do; This year, I want to make plans on the weekends with nice people and spend the time outdoors (see how I just did that, I combined #3 with #6!). If I plan, it is more likely to happen.

Happy New Year everyone and by way, I am not waiting until Jan. 1st; I am starting now! And my New Year's wish for you - may you do what you want, the way you want, without hurting yourself or others!